Category: sling library

Why does a bit of fabric mean so much?

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Just over two years ago I wrote this blog for the Natural Mamas website: “But it’s just a bit of cloth“.  Since then many more bits of cloth have made it into this house. Isaac is now 3.5 and not carried as much but when he is I still love the flexibility of a woven wrap and often a ring sling too. The memories are even more special the more infrequent they become.

I have owned lots of different wraps but can I make a confession? I have never owned a handwoven, a Pamir or an Artipoppe for example.  Although I have holidayed and played with some of them. I haven’t wanted to own one. That does not mean I have always brought standard line wraps and have owned some limited editions and harder to find slings. My beloved Didymos Silver Geckos 6 took 18 months to find.  This lack of High End wraps doesn’t make me any less or more of a wrapper than someone who has only ever used a SPOC or a budget brand. We are carrying our children. That is all that matters. We are holding them close when it matters.

Wrapping has helped me stay sane. From the early days of a Velcro reflux baby, to wake up from naps, during post op recovery, to mundane things of walking the dog and doing the school run. It has let Isaac attend social events from the security of mummies back. Even today at 3.5 he was a little daunted by an event. But cuddles in our ring sling let him get used to where he was before he chose to go and play.

This week however I have taken delivery of a Woven Wings Leaf Gold Geo and paid for a Pavo Textiles wrap.

The WW is for the sling library  but the Pavo is for me. Why have I just brought it? Well it is called Coy Hearts. My surname is Coy.  I felt it would be the perfect way for us to end our carrying journey. I just hope Isaac has the same feelings. I suppose it will be a legacy wrap. Lots of people want to know what their legacy wrap is. Often believing it has to be the one release on the day their baby was born. It what if you don’t like it? What if there wasn’t one?  A legacy wrap can be anything if you like it, anything that means something to you. I am dreading the day our carrying journey comes to an end. So I suppose I should enjoy the cuddles while I can and make the most of them.

What’s new at North East Sling Library

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I have been quite on the blog for a few weeks. The school holidays mean time to catch up with my kids and also my husband (he is a teacher).  But they are now drawing to a close and I am beginning to think about getting ‘back to work’. I say back to work, more back to the library fully as I haven’t really stopped. I did cancel all but 3 sessions during school holidays and have enjoyed time away with my boys and Natural Mamas Big camp but now its time to get fully back into NESL action. 

 

So what is new? What is happening?

Firstly I am now an approved retailer of ErgoBaby products and Close Parent products in addition to the ability to order Boba, Beco, Moby, Scootababy, Hana Baby and Connecta Baby Carrier products. I can’t offer as greater deals as the larger retailers but by ordering through me you know you are getting a legitimate product with the knowledge to show you how to use it properly.

Next we have broken the 250 sling barrier. At Natural Mamas Big Camp I came back with a boot full of goodies. This included another Toddler Solar Connecta Baby Carrier, a standard Solar Connecta Baby Carrier, two more Connecta and a new Fidella Fusion full buckle carrier. There has also been the arrival of several more in the days before – more Ergo Baby carriers and a selection of stunning Ring Slings – Oscha Starry Night Daisy, Oscha Roses Damson and Roses Dusk, with more to follow.

   

And the biggest news! No I am not expecting. But North East Sling Library now has uniform. You will never be in any doubt over who is who at sessions as this week T-shirts/Polo Shirts, tunics, dresses and hoodies for me and my team, plus Demo Doll Isaac arrived. The hoodies polo shirts/t-shirts feature our names and role too. Some of you had a sneak peak at Durham City Sling and Nappy meet but they will be launching fully from next week.

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Finally when and where can you find NESL in the next few weeks?

Our next drop in session is Wednesday 26th August between 10-12 at NESL HQ, 13 Brecken Way Meadowfield Durham DH78UZ. There are no 1:1 consultations now available until the first week of September (3rd September). From Monday 7th September we will be offering appointments on 1st and 3rd Monday of each month. For availability and booking for 1:1 appointments please visit our booking website.  Library drop in sessions for September are as follows:

Wednesday 9th 10-12 Meadowfield
Saturday 12th 2-4 Meadowfield
Monday 14th 11-1 Miss Tina’s Washington​
Wednesday 16th 10.30-12 Birth & Baby Network​
Thursday 17th 10-12 Durham Marriott Hotel Royal County​ for Durham City Sling and Real Nappy Meet​
Wednesday 23rd 10-12 Meadowfield
Monday 28th 12.15-1.30 Consett Tesco​ community room.

Postal hire continues to be available too.

Best wishes everyone and enjoy the last few days of the holidays.

Rachel

In celebration of our Carried Big Kids

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Picture1Anyone who has read my blogs, or who follows my Facebook page will know that my babies are not babies anymore.  My ‘carried baby’ is now 3 but he is carried almost daily and over recent days has been carried even more than normal. A combination of the heat and not sleeping very well (probably also heat related) has meant Isaac has wanted cuddles with his Mummy and Daddy just that bit more. I have no qualms in carrying him when he needs it or when it makes my life that bit easier.

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Isaac opts for daddies shoulders and Henry asked for a cuddle after a full on morning at Centre Parcs climbing trees.

There are plenty of 3 year olds who are still transported by their parents in a pushchair, and also countless who get a piggy back or ride on a carers shoulders. Why should being carried in a sling be a seen as any different? All babies, no matter how old need and want that security. The research has shown that those who are carried develop secure attachments which helps promote brain development and independence. Anyone who witnesses my two boys running off to play in the park or cycling so fast I can’t keep up will know they are not clingy; they are secure in the knowledge that I am there and that they can explore.

You can imagine my disgust at a recent photograph that has been circulating on social media of  a Mum carrying her 5 year old while out shopping. Although uncommon, carrying my 5 year old in a carrier is something I do on occasion. The photograph was secretly taken by a shop assistant and then shared on her Facebook profile shaming the mother for carrying her child and pushing her baby in a pushchair. This photo has been shared in several groups I am a member of and has attracted attention from around the world. One post on Netmums Facebook page had over 300 comments when I last looked.

There are several reasons why I dislike this photo and why I will not share the photo itself in this post; although you can read more about it and see the picture here. Firstly the photograph was taken and shared without permission by an employee as she worked. Who thinks this is a good idea? And why did she have her phone with her anyway? Secondly, the comments she wrote in attributing the photos were full of hate and disgust. It is nobody’s right to question how I or the mum in that photo parent our children. Finally does it really matter if the 5 year old was having a carry. Would the shop worker have snapped a photo the mum if she had her little girl on her shoulders or was giving her a piggy back? Exactly what is the difference here? The only thing I can see was that she was being carried in a standard size sling (a Tula Baby Carrier) rather than a specifically made toddler or preschool carrier. But the Tula has been tested to use to 45lb, (my 5.5 year old doesn’t weigh that), so there is nothing unsafe about carrying an older child in a standard sling as long as within weight limits and comes sufficiently up their back to stop them falling out and this sling does.

Carrying our big kids is clearly something lots of the mums and dads I work with do. Our toddler and preschool carriers (weight wise many go to 24kg which is way past preschool) are some of the most popular I have. People hire them for holidays, long walks, day trips and sometimes just so they can have a cuddle without having to hold the full weight of their child; ideal if you have disabilities or medical conditions for example. I asked the patents in my Facbook group to share their stories and their photographs in celebration of their big kids. Here are just some of their stories and reasons to carry their big kids.

Jeni McAuley

Firstly we have Jeni and her little one, she said that sling cuddles are important because:

“Hands free, slingy cuddles are still great at 26 months and totally beats a buggy in city centres. This is us in NYC last month.”

carlaNext is Carla and her gorgeous big girl. She said she carried her because although her 5year old is not carried usually she was

  “tired and grumpy and needed a rest.”

Jillian carries her 4 year old when needed, although on this day trip Daddy got the duties and his back saved his arms.

David b“We still wear our almost 4 year old because sometimes little legs get tired when we’re out on adventures and nothing beats a Daddy (or Mummy) slingy cuddle (and it’s loads easier than carrying her in your arms!!) “

Sarah T said  one of the reasons why she carries her older child is because “They say they definitely want to walk. They don’t want you to take the double buggy, then they get tired….and other times it’s just a lot safer in large crowds. I don’t want her to be trodden on, or possibly worse, to escape!” Surely that is a good enough reason to carry our children.

One of the most common reasons we found were because our big kids were poorly. Here is Becky J’s husband carrying her little boy (3.5 years in the photo) because he was unwell with chicken pox and wanted some fresh air. In this photo they are using a standard size baby carrier (an Ergo Baby Carrier) just like the mum was in the photo which prompted this blog. becky

Thank you to all the mummies who shared photos and their reasons for carrying older children. I hope that the person who took the original photograph to criticise a mum just going about her normal business will realise that #carryingisnormal no matter what the age of our babies, after all no matter how old our children are they will forever be our babies. I have collated some of the other photographs in this video.

How responsive is “responsive”?

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Apparently, according to Facebook I need to reply faster my clients. Apparently the fact I replied to 96% of messages in 8 minutes, or if you checked two days ago 100% in 19 and wait even 100% in 6 minutes is not fast enough.  Although none of these figures will be shown to users on my page as I don’t yet hit what they class as responsive enough.  We live in a world of 24:7 news, we want our food fast, our media instant and apparently no longer willing to wait. But, surely this “responsive to messages” thing that Facebook is currently adding to pages is one step too far.   Are we not allowed a life? How an earth do you get the green “responsive to messages” icon? 

  
This icon is granted to pages that have a median (I had to remember my secondary school maths lessons to figure out what that meant) responsive rate of 90% in 5 minutes over the space of a week. Read Facebooks explanation of how it works here.

 I feel I am pretty responsive as it is. I reply to emails, texts, posts and Facebook messages as quickly as I can. I am a primarily a Mum of two and a wife. I do need to sleep, eat, walk dog etc! For emails I aim personably to reply within 2 hours but definitely within 24. I have Facebook on 3 different devices, I reply when I can. I am not going to stop playing with my kids (or sleeping) so that I can reply instantly around the clock. 

Over 50% of the messages I get are when I am asleep. The nature of catering to parents of babies is, they will typically be awake at night. This time last year I frequently had conversations with people as I tried to get Isaac to sleep all night. Now, thankfully, I have two children who do sleep and therefore I am not sat on landing catching up with admin at 1,2,3am.

That means messages sent in evenings are not going to be replied to until the next day (usually before 8am). But Facebook doesn’t seem to get that we are human beings not robots. I am not a big corporate business with lots of staff who can reply 24/7 and 365 days a year. You have me, Rachel and my volunteers. Yes, volunteers who like me are allowed to sleep/eat/live too. 

The next issue  I have is when do the messages stop counting as being responded too. Take for example this common conversation completed via my page message function:

“Can you tell me when next library session is” Reply with dates and times 

“Oh that’s great will you have x,y,z sling” 

“Yes we have x,y, and z will be back on” 

“Thanks, see you on X” 

I usually then add a “see you then, any questions ask”…..but frequently they will come back with an “ok”, “thanks” etc. When does it stop. “You hang up”, “no you”. So once I have to ended a conversation as the last one to reply, does that mean I get 100%? What if I decide to not carry on the games of constantly replying? Currently Facebook classes these as not responded too. At least now while I am answering messages via my PC they have allowed me the benefit of prefilled stock responses (and ability to add own). This is great for while I am on computer but it doesn’t yet exist on the app for iPhone or iPad, where I spend almost 80% of my “online” time.

I hope my clients will understand that if I don’t get the iconic “responsive to messages” icon they won’t think I am useless or not focused on their needs. I hope they will realise that I too have a life. That I too need to be able to care for my kids. My part time job is a big part of my life, but it is not the only thing in my life.  Facebook, you really need to reasses your priorities, if you think 5 minutes is an acceptable time to wait.

So if I never reach the Facebook holy grail of 90% in 5 minutes, to be honest I don’t think I care. “Control the controllable” is one do the phrases we live by in this house and Facebook algorithms are definitely not controllable.

Edited on 1st July – despite me not doing anything differently in the day I have apparently been deemed worthy of the green message icon. I have started switching message function off at night. Do you think this is the reason. Wonder how long I will keep it for?