An ever changing industry

img_2705Today I read a comment on a video on Social Media site saying how what I do is “not new” and in a way the lady is right. But, the comment did make me think – probably as I was the one demoing how to use a sling in the video she commented on. Babywearing/carrying our young – call it what you will – is a millennia old practise. For as long as we have needed to move, we have needed to carry our young. Without the ability to carry our young we would not have developed as the highly successful species we are today; we simply could not have moved at the speed required (T. Taylor – The Artificial Ape).

What is different now, is that the skills of carrying our young are not passed down from generation to generation as they once were. The Industrial Revolution and the move to the towns in the 1800s and the outbreak of World War I and World War II required women to be in the work place more. This shift in social position led to an increase in the world of nurseries, and a decrease in breastfeeding and carrying of our children, and thus the loss of skills once common place.

When I began carrying Henry in 2010 there was no local support available. Google, YouTube and Facebook became my teachers and led me to sources of help. The nearest ‘in person’ support I could get was a 90-minute drive away; not something I wanted to do with a new baby.  The support I gained from likeminded parents was invaluable in the early days and until around 2010 there was very little professionalisation of the industry. The launch of the  Consortium of Sling Manufacturers and Retailers and the TICKS guidelines for safe babywearing in 2010 were some of the first steps towards professionalisation. DSCF2830

Early pioneers of babywearing in the UK had started  to train as consultants and there were courses organised from Clauwi and Trageschule Dresden in the late 2000s. I was lucky that many of these women were also members of the Natural Mamas forum. They inspired me and they still do. The birth of the School of Babywearing in late 2010 and Trageschule UK in early 2011 brought increase access, flexibility and training opportunities to the UK. Until then, courses had to be specifically arranged with European training schools.

At the same time as increased training opportunities, there was a massive growth in ‘in person’ peer support through the foundation of many of the biggest sling libraries in the UK. The West Yorkshire Sling Library, the South London Sling Library, South East Slings (formerly Eastbourne Sling Library) and myself were all founded in late 2010 or 2011. In many cases, sling libraries formed out of existing ‘sling meets’ or from LLL lending libraries etc. NESL was founded as there was simply nothing here and I saw a need and wanted to help.  The increase in training opportunities and a growing public knowledge of the existence of sling libraries led to a massive growth from late 2011 onwards. Until 2011 there were just 20 sling libraries in the UK. This amazing timeline from South East Slings (accurate up to 2015) shows just what a transformation happened.

The hardest part for me was to ask for payment for my services. When I first started NESL I did not have any training but the hire fees I took (£5 for 2 weeks when I first began) went to buy stock, website and URL, refreshments and advertising materials. Eventually, there was sufficient money in the pot to fund my first training course in March 2012. Since then, I have gone onto to complete 3 more training courses and have invested thousands in stock, insurance, websites and promotional materials. The more I invested, the less I could allow the sling library to be a hobby.

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There are times when people question why I charge. But without charging I could not exist. I could not buy stock or replacement stock. I could not pay to travel to CPD or for extra training, I couldn’t pay for insurance etc. Yes, I enjoy helping families and seeing their faces when they find a carrier that works for them brings joy to my heart. But, if I didn’t charge I would be undermining the work I have done and devalue the services of myself and the other consultants in the UK. We are in an world where help is often sought out by parents. I did. Doulas, feeding specialists, Lactation Consultants, Hypnobirthing teachers, Baby Massage instructors etc. all charge.

Babywearing Consultants are therefore no different. One day I hope that the work I do, will be as valued as that of other professionals working with families. Professionalisation of the baby-carrying industry has led to increased standards; those who provide a bad service won’t survive. Professionalisation has led to safety standards which keep babies safe. Professionalisation has led to the TICKS guidelines; now widely accepted as ‘best practise’. Professionalisation means ease of access and local support. The industry may be a new one but it is an ever changing, ever growing one and something I am immensely proud to be a part of .

Slings, clothes, toys and the new Milk Tray Man.

Today has been a long day (I got up at 4 am and on the train at 5am – but this did mean I got lots of admin done). I am tired but it has been worth it. Today, I have been to London and been introduced to the world of media companies and parenting awards: I have been a guest expert judge. Not something I ever thought I would say when I founded NESL. But, over the last 5.5 years I have worked hard to develop a reputation as a trusted voice; today is a culmination of the hardwork and determination I have put in to building up the sling library.

In August 2016, I was contacted by Hazelann from Made For Mums after commenting on a thread on their Facebook page and since then I have been helping them with sling related questions, and am looking forward to continuing to do so. This led to an email inviting me to act as an expert guest judge. I am img_0775eternally grateful to have they employer for allowing me to have the morning off work in order to attend. The Made for Mum Awards will be known by many as the Prima Baby Awards. We have been judging lots of categories: infant footwear, sleep products, maternity clothes, and of course slings, to name just a few. Other categories were judged yesterday too. You can see which brands have been shortlisted and help by taking part in the online voting by clicking this link.

My fellow judges came from the world of journalism, midwifery, medicine and even the new Milk Tray Man (and yes he bought us chocolates but wasn’t wearing the trademark black polo neck sweater). The thing that united us: we are all parents. I was able to demo how to use the carriers, many of which my other judges had not previously seen. The team from MFM even filmed me demoing how to tie a stretchy wrap, this will be on their Facebook page soon.

It has been an amazing day. I have had a glimpse inside a world I didn’t know existed and loved every minute of it. Now, as I sit drinking a cup of tea and watch the darkness flash by, I am feeling very honoured to have been part of an amazing day. Thank you so much to the MFM’s team for inviting me and a huge thank you for letting me bring a couple of bits home for me and my boys, but most importantly for allowing me to bring home a new carrier for the sling library: the Mountain Buggy Juno Carrier (although currently missing its newborn insert as I forgot to put it in the box). I am sure this will be a very popular addition to our stock and it is available to hire now!

Saying goodbye to Durham City Sling Meet

After nearly 3 years it is with sadness that I announce that Durham City Sling Meet is to cease in February (NESL will continue). Initially opened as a social meet for like minded parents wanting to find out more about slings and a real nappies, it grew into one of our busiest sessions. However, with my return to work and the  closure of the nappy library it became harder to run.

The amazing Kelly has since September (with support from Emily) been running the session for me, as a peer-support  led meet. Unfortunately, both Kelly and Emily cannot continue. They both have young families and are finding it difficult to mix both. I empathise completely as I know exactly what it is like trying to run a session while also being mum.


Our last session will be Thursday 16th February. This will be for returns/renewals only. New hires/swaps will not be available.  Anyone who wishes to hire a new sling or find out more is still welcome to attend our Durham home-based sessions on 2nd/4th Saturdays of the month (except March where there is no 4th Saturday session as I am away for my husbands birthday).

Please join with me in thanking Kelly and Emily for their help over the past 6 months.  It would be fantastic if lots of us (I’ll be work) can join them to celebrate what DCSM has been and to thank them for their help.

Burns Night celebration of Scottish links

January 25th sees the annual celebration of Burns Night (and the anniversary of the great Scottish Poet, Robert Burns’ birth in 1759). To celebrate, I thought I would share two of my favourite slings (or brands) from the library.


Firstly, have you seen our Harris Tweed Connecta Baby Carriers. Harris Tweed is woven in the Outer Hebrides and only a select range of companies all allowed by the Harris Tweed Authority to use it and add the famous Harris Tweed label. Wool is naturally breathable and although many think this is a winter fabric it can be surprisingly cool in the spring and summer too.


The other is the Scottish Wrap company – Oscha. I remember when they launched. Many an Oscha wrap has passed through here and one of their classic Roses collection – Roses Dusk – is inspired my my dyed Roses Zen.

 

This ring sling celebrates its 4th birthday today, as it was dyed to match the bridesmaids dress I wore for my sisters wedding (happy 4th wedding anniversary Becky and Mark).


We have several stunning Oscha ring slings available to hire for that special occasion, including; Vanilla Rose and Roses of the North, as well as Starry Night Orchid.

So let’s support British design, manufacture and business on the Baird’s Birthday.

 

Pack Horse Parents united

Although I have been at work today, it has been impossible to miss many of thr headlines. I am, apparently,  a pack-horse parent. That is, I “strap my 4 year old to my back” and “don’t let him walk”. Excuse me, but what a lot of old waffle. Unfortunately, this is the myth that the Daily Mail, elements of the BBC and Loose Women have been advocating today. If it were true I would not have as many preschool carriers in the library as I do. Carrying ‘big kids’ is something I have blogged about before and a topic I feel passionately about.

Very few, if anyone, starts out their carrying journey by ‘carrying a 4-year- old’. We start carrying a baby and they grow and we grow in strength with them. They learn that they can come to us for a cuddle and no we won’t turn them away. Our bodies adapt to their changing needs; from front carrying, to hip and back carries, and even tandem carrying.

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Giving my best ‘pack-horse’ impression after a late night flight.

Toddler and preschool children need, want and seek security, love and warmth as much as small babies. Their mothers and fathers mean safety. Attachment Theory has for the past 70 years taught us that meeting children’s basic need to be love and cared or is not in their best interest.  Children who do not have positive or secure attachments suffer developmentally. The strategies we develop to communicate are aversive in their nature – designed to protect us – but without positive reinforcement disappear and stop being used: children can, and will, go into themselves, stop communicating and hide from the world around them.

 

Children, do not stop needing this support and encouragement just because they can have a conversation and walk. It is not up to the media to tell parents how to parent: that is up to the parent to decide. If that means using a sling or carrier (or even a buggy) to carry their 2,3,4,5 year old, that is up to them. No arguments, no discussion needed. It is their choice.  Physiologically it can take the body 90-120 minutes to calm down to normal levels of stress hormones and emotions after they have been upset or frightened. Where else better is there for a child to be when they are trying to regain normal feelings? Even if they appear calm and relaxed there are often hiccups which can pus them back into flight mode.David b

Although we are “born with legs” those legs do not allow us to walk immediately at birth, it is a skill we need to learn and practise. Like any skill, learning it is tiring and takes time to master. It is therefore natural that sometimes children won’t want to walk yet nobody bats and eyelid if you give child a piggy back. What exactly is the difference? What if those little legs just can’t walk at the speed we need to go at? Do we dawdle at toddler-speed or use devices which can help us reach our targets and goals? In all other elements of life, labour-saving, time-saving devices are praised.

The world is a busy place. How would you feel watching it all from knee-height, unable to fully understand the magnitude of it? Now imagine how exhilarating it would be to see if from the same height as an adult? To talk about what you can see, to ask questions and hear answers, bury your head into Mum’s neck if it gets too much? That is why I carry my children.hoggs-3-tandem

Carrying children is normal! Do not let sensationalist headlines and daytime TV tell you otherwise. Do what feels right for your child/children. If it feels right, then it most probably is right. Carry your children for as long as you need and want to, whether that is for days, weeks, months or years. The benefits, far outweigh the disadvantages.